6/17
I just had the most realistic dream (more like memory, since it felt like deja vu). I was back in that god-awful chair next to Grape, L.L., Cherry, Orange, and Raspberry when Perkins came into the room. It was my turn.
He was in a good mood. After rebranding, and switching from liquid to powder, our sales were up. Even the poorest families of the ’30s were buying Kool-Ade (soon switched to Kool-Aid) for their children. I preferred the liquid. It hurt a lot less.
I struggled in the beginning, and although it never got easier, we soon realized that there was no use in fighting. The others watched me in pity, but also fear, knowing that their turn would soon come.
I was the most popular flavor. Although it hurt, it also meant I was safe. Raspberry was the least popular flavor, and we all knew that if sales did not go up, they would be replaced.

There was no true safety though because, in the end, we were all replaceable.

“Good job, you all, especially you, Red.” He smiled like a little boy.
Red was his nickname for me because even though Raspberry was the same color as me, I always bled the most.
I woke up.
KM

It has come to light that a page called cybervandals has recently made accusations about our company. First, he left hateful comments, about our placement of flavors (see "Koolaid Flavors Ranked") then he made more personal attacks, bringing up juice color in a discriminatory light. "Are we bringing skin color into this? ...red is invalid..." and "Have you ever considered Flavor Reassignment Surgery?" The suggestion he made of our company bringing color into this is simply untrue, in fact, it was him who brought it up. Since we do not wish to be dramatic, we will change the "Koolaid Flavors Ranked" list. We hope this satisfies everyone.
Thank you, loyal customers,

KM

If anyone knows how to put a 'static' filter over a page, (bonus points if it's static intermediately, or flickers) please let us know.
We will give you full credit.
Thank you,
KM

5/25
As I was making sure no misinformation was being spread about me, I read an article that referred to my lifespan, saying, "Sure, it's a red, skinless form that's vulnerable to infection and will die soon, but that liquid would be the Kool-Aid Man ... Because if he's the liquid, then he's losing parts of his body, which is disturbing.”
I guess that I had always just assumed that since I wasn't exactly human, I wouldn't die. I have never really thought about it before. Knowing that I was superior was good enough. But now I wonder if I am losing parts of my body as I speak? Who am I? If I die, will I go to human heaven? Is there a god? Am I even real?
Maybe this is a mid-life crisis. (Is this the middle of my life? Am I halfway done already? Have I peaked?)
Luckily, someone responded to our job listing. The 'interviews' always make me feel a little better. Even if I don't know who I am, I do know one thing. Someone dressing up in a costume, pretending to be me, is a dishonor to everyone. The boy wrote us saying he "had experience as a voice actor" and had "no problem 'kicking a door down'." How pathetic. As if that's all it takes. He'll regret this soon.
I'm going to start recalling my dreams here, so I don't keep forgetting them.
KM

Sorry in advance for the upcoming inactivity, the ones who don't want to see us succeed have tried blocking our computers from Myspace. We're trying to correct the issue as quickly as possible.
Kool-aid Man loves you all,
(except for the ones who ask too many questions, or come after hours.)
KM

1. Pink Lemonade

2. Tropical Punch

3. Grape

4. Berry Cherry

5. Mixed Berry

6. Strawberry Kiwi

7. Lemonade

8. Pina Pineapple

9. Sharkleberry Fin

10. Strawberry

11. Cherry

12. Watermelon

13. Blue-Raspberry Lemonade

14. Lemon-Lime

15. Orange

16. Black Cherry

lmk if im missing any flavors

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