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kieran valentine's Blog

"how may i romance you?"
9 years old
Last Login: 1624277795000
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𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐈.

when i left monster high after draculaura's sweet 1600 birthday party, i was angry, humiliated and stinky from falling into that pit of eternal body odor. i stank so bad, mom wouldn't even let me in the house. i had to sleep in the guest room above the garage. looking back, i can see it was probably the best thing that could have happened to me. even my considerable powers to charm were no match for the power of the stench that surrounded me. my powers slowly weakened as i was deprived of what sustained them, the love i selfishly took from others. i was in a stench induced imprisonment - rarely leaving the garage - but it allowed me time to do some serious thinking, and i realized i wasn't being true to myself. then one day there was a knock at my door, and i opened it to see a little old goblin woman with a cane staring up at me through thick glasses.

"i'm mrs goblin, but you can call me mrs goblin. i'm a friend of your mother's," she said. "you need to get out of that room, and i need some help, so lets go." she turned and walked off, and with nothing left to lose, i followed her. it turned out she ran an unwanted creature shelter, and couldn't keep up with all the cleaning, feeding and daily upkeep. it also turned out she had no sense of smell. "lost it back in 72." she told me. mrs g ran me through the daily routine and gave me the tour. "you can start today." she said as she handed me a mop and bucket. it's hard to believe i agreed, but i didn't have any other options. the shelter was home to an unusual collection of exotic creatures. gremlins, flying monkeys, lap dragons, miniature manticores, and many others that had been picked up as strays or turned in by monsters who didn't want them. even though the work was hard, and not always pleasant, i began to look forward to it. in fact, i usually felt more energized after i finished a day than when i started it. i felt my powers returning and every day i got stronger. eventually i mentioned it to mrs goblin, who snickered. "you emotional vampires never get it - stolen love is just empty calories. it'll never sustain you for long." she could tell i still didn't get it. "love that's freely giving is the most powerful source of energy in the monster universe. you've been coming here every day, taking care of these critters, showing them kindness, and the only thing they have to give you is their love - and believe me, they have a lot to give."

i couldn't believe what she was telling me. i must have been standing there looking stupid because she said "close your mouth before the flies get in and go clean the flying monkey cage. they've been throwing stuff again." i was in a daze. why had no one ever explained this to me? rather than dwelling on it, i was just happy i finally knew.

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