i feel like passing out right now. this is as far as i can go as far as i'm concerned. i have more missing assignments than i've ever had in the history of my life, i have an essay due today, there's tons of shit on my bed, and i'm sleep deprived as hell. i don't know where i'm going to go in life after highschool, if i can even make it to freshman year. this website and an array of other non-school related things are the only things keeping me happy at this point. i'm so tired of being alone all the time, having nobody next to me to work this shit out. people always say, "stop trying to find validation and happiness in other people, find it in yourself," or however the hell it goes. well guess what toots? i have no idea how to do that. i've had people praising my work, praising my abilities, constantly comforting me all my life, but now that i'm at a stage in life where i have to learn to be more independent, i don't have those types of people anymore. i'm always "a pleasure to have in class," but what happens when your little "pleasure" is tired and depressed and deprived of all life? then what? it's almost 3 AM and i could give less of a fuck at this point. good-fucking-night, and fuck the american school system.
~ cruely, Leer.