i think i fucked up

i feel like im out of my body. im just not in that universe. i dont care about my school, because i feel like im somewhere else. besides, whats the point? i mean, i know i won't make it. i know im gonna be dead before end of highschool. i will not have any future, so why should i try? my family keeps telling me that "i shouldnt do it, because theres so many things to live for" but they dont see, that being here brings me so much pain, like, i know, there is lot of things to live for, but i just dont have energy. i dont have any energy to stay alive.
anyway, hope that none of you will ever feel the same way,
Chuu