Old document I found

I stopped myself from doing it, from committing suicide. But it didn't only leave me alive, it also left me empty. This was not supposed to happen.
Doctors testified that i was having a psychosis, which means that my punishment won't be too hard for me to bear.

I have to spend the rest of my life in a mental hospital, where nurses and doctors are taking care of me. They let me finish my book, and it has helped me a lot. I wrote a happy ending, just for myself.
I feel better now, I am more at peace with myself, even though I'm still stuck in my mind, but i accept that now. I can never forgive myself for harming and self-medicating myself. But i have so many supportive people around me now, so i think i will be ok.
My Doctor is mentoring me and is watching my progress. I am lucky to have him.

My friend's visits me every once in a while, when the doctor let them that is. The doctors still think thier visits are too "destabilizing" for me and that hinders my progress. I keep on telling them on how sorry i am for making thier life miserable everytime they are here. They then just laughs a bit and tells me to stop being so silly, but I can see the damage I've done to them in thier eyes every time they look at me. They found new friends, one who is there for them and treats them right. I'm happy for them, though I'll miss the good moments we've had, knowing that they'll never come back.

I think this is a good time to close this book.
It has changed my life forever.